Naples Pub Crawl

I traveled to Naples Saturday afternoon for their '3-Some Pub Crawl', their 3rd anniversary event. We met at a hotel around 6PM in Naples since we figured that after hitting 6-7 pubs, few would be in driving shape. HayRideMe from West Palm Beach brought over MistHerBush and another 4 friends (Tracey, Melissa, Joe, etc) and arrived around the same time as I did. We hung out in their room for a while and chatted as the others hashers were joining. Though a few others were supposed to come down with me (CaughtFromBehind, Service, Candy, KittyLitter, Wronghole) all off them dropped out over the past week, so I was the only Tampa attendee. Orlando hashers ThanksForTheMammaries, Catmando, and OralHershey as well as Washington D.C hasher F'em Dano showed up for the event as well.

HighBallz led the circle with the introductions and such and then with a requested 3 minute head start (which as expected, probably turned into 10 minutes at least) we had a few accusations and announcements to make. TurfTits has been complaining about my not bringing some panties, bra, and other stuff that she had left in my room the last time the Naples folks visited Tampa (I slept on the couch that weekend, thank you). Hashers have a tradition of using lost property as accusation material, generally for just being forgetful and somewhat annoying in making others keep track of their stuff. I called her into the circle and explained to the pack that I was accusing her of lost property and could see how she got excited as I pulled out a plastic shopping bag, expecting to finally get her stuff.

"I accuse Turf of leaving her stuff in my place, and after considerable searching, I think I have located her items."

I then pulled out the largest pair of panties that you have ever seen. Her look changed quite dramatically from excitement to horror as I stretched out those things. I think that they were about as wide as she was tall (Turf is a tiny young lass). The pack seemed to think it was quite funny. Right before I drove down Saturday, I had stopped by the thrift store and rummaged through the women's section. The moment I found them I knew it was perfect! I have no idea what happened to her original stuff and I probably just tossed them when I was on a cleaning spree several months ago. I paid for her weekend pub crawl and we agreed to call it even.

After circle, we did a trail of a total of about 50 meters; straight to the back of a 20' moving truck that was complete with several couches, coolers, and seats. Everyone loaded in and we headed to the first of several pubs. The bars were about as expected, though a bit empty as it was still quite early in the evening (after all, we were starting around 7 o'clock). We had a nice spread of food at the half way mark of wings, pizza, fries, and poppers along will all the expected beer. Music was a bit varied, but at one bar it was a bit off as the DJ (with the term used quite loosely) jumping to different tempos and genres. The pack was dancing for a while with some nice rock or alternative and then without warning it would just be switch to something like Bryan Adams or other such sleeper song. Mammaries, along with other members of the pack, was calling for the guy to try to get something better in play. At some point the DJ (that was quite short, kind of like Service in Tampa) walked over to Mammaries's companion, who had nothing to do with any of this and was just sitting with her minding his own business, and started fussing about the music requests/complaints. Mams, a very easy going veterinarian, got a bit annoyed and stood up to say something and was cut off by the guys hasty retreat back to his booth. We hit a few more spots before finally closing down the bowling alley bar (our last stop) around 2AM. As we left to get back into the van, Fux grabbed one of the bowling balls and took it out of the building and threw it in the truck. I can tolerate some things people do, but blatant stealing like that is just not cool. I grabbed the ball and took it back inside, Fux was pretty oblivious to most things anyway, but later found he also may have taken a pitcher and glass at some point in the evening.

We got back to the hotel around 3AM and hung around for a while. At some point Turf and Hershey had gone to the room to sleep. Fux, for some unknown reason, just started pounding on their door. I immediately told him to stop and he honestly could not comprehend the fact that the noise wouldn't be limited to just that room. I again reiterated that it was a very bad idea, but stupid is as stupid does, so he kept doing it for a while. At some point the manager, looking like an evil Santa Claus, came out and, without warning, told everyone they had to leave. Not a single thing had been said before this point by anyone outside the group, though several of us tried to get the others to quiet down at some point. A local sheriff's officer came by and had to force the vacancy since his hands were tied. The problem was not only did they kick out the group of us that had retired to the room that the West Palm Beach people had, but the cop went to the room that had Turf and Hershey sleeping, opened it up, and told them to leave. They hadn't don't anything to warrant this, and protested as such, but the manager said they were merely 'guilty by association' and demanded their removal. The cop was very professional throughout this, even with Fux's (and some other guy I don't know) were being a bit belligerent. Turf and Queen let me crash with them, so I left to follow them back as soon as I had helped some people load their stuff. I heard from Porcelina that after we left, the police had to come back since Fux and a few others still hadn't left and threw them in cuffs for continuing to trespass, but eventually let them go [probably a bad idea]. Sad how just a couple of idiots can screw over so many others. Being drunk is fine, but when you're a stupid drunk and being an asshole, then you need find some other group.

In the morning HB and I unloaded the van, retanked it, and took it by the rental facility and then joined Porcelina, Dano, AssFault and his girl for breakfast. With the truck rental, food, and beer the hash ended up a little bit in the whole, but they had a lot of fun. It was very well planned and executes. Unfortunately I don't think any of them will be able to make the TBH3 Red Dress Run next week (which unfortunately has Orlando and West Palm having their event at the same time). It takes a lot of work to organize these kinds of events in getting a block of hotel rooms reserved, contacting and negotiating with 6-7 bars, picking up the materials, etc. Porcelina and HighBallz have, as always, done a great job to get the hash organized and make sure that everyone has a good time. Without them, the overall event would not have been nearly as interesting or fun. I hope that the pack down there appreciate the amount of work that they both put into the events.

I was the hash camera whore for most of the evening after getting ahold of Porcelina's camera and will add photos of the event as soon she sends them to me. Overall, I had a wonderful time and really enjoyed hanging out with friends and meeting several new people.