The only two things a pirate will run for is money and public office

Just for kicks and giggles I decided to make a last minute trip to Ybor to take part in the charity 'Half-way to Gasparilla Pub Crawl'. Even with a early start, there were quite a few people there with each bar seeing a pack dance area. The pub crawl included access to The honey Pot, The Castle, Club Skye, and Club Tantra (formally known as the Amphitheater). I was able to run into several friends and had a pretty good time. It had been many, many years since I had been to The Castle and I really liked getting back there and may have to consider visiting again in the future.

All the world looks up to a skydiver.

'Excuse me while kiss the sky.'

It had been about three years since I last did a real honest to goodness skydive. I had a wonderfully gifted high wire bungee/bungy jump experience when in New Zealand last year that was pretty cool, but I still missed the feeling of a longer freefall even if it didn't have quite the ground rush. So this week I decided to just pull my rig from the closet shelf, check for spiders, moths, and small families of rodents or marsupials, and head to the drop zone. Since it had been so long since the last jump I had to go through a quick recertification class, but some things in life you just don't tend to forget, especially stuff that's suppose to help save your life. The weather sucked most of the day so I sat around talking to my buddy Jason waiting for it to clear up. The jump was normal, and it felt great. Even after a good bit of an absence it felt like I hadn't left. I burned through the testing skills, opened up, and enjoyed a decent canopy ride, even though I did land slightly off the DZ due to high winds.

After packing the parachute, which will be the real test of my memory on the next jump, I headed over the the hash event. I've been out of the activity for a few months while I reevaluated a lot of stuff, but this was supposed to be a pretty big event with some out-of-towners coming in, so I decided to make it out. Tattoo is infamous for his last trail that was a shot trail that saw the pack barely making it to the end due to the numerous shots provided on trail. We met in the Westchase area and boarded the rented bus that took us to the various colorful and cultured sites in Tampa for the pub crawl. It was nice to see some old friends and I actually started to enjoy myself again, which I actually didn't expect. I got to see Mams and Shop Teacher and hear all about their three week honeymoon to Turkey, Jordan, Israel, and Egypt. The after party was at Tattoo's place and was complete with jello wrestling food, lots of great food, and plenty of remaining kegs. I ended up staying the evening since I wasn't about to drive 40 minutes so late at night after such a party evening. I'm actually thinking of getting back out to some more events sometime if time allows.

Excuse me, maam, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?

Attended the Annual Tampa H3 Red Dress Run today. Since late-November, I really haven't been going to many hash runs, so it was nice to get out and see some old friends. We hit several locations near the old water tower in Sulphur Springs with even a special bus transportation arrange to take us to a dance place so everyone could have some fun.

Have purple toga, will pontificate.

After waking up and doing some cleaning from the big party last night, Kristen, a couple of friends that stayed overnight, and I drove to Cocoa Beach to attend a toga pub crawl with the hashers of BVD. We got in early enough to relax for a while before getting dressed up and heading to meet the rest of the group. We had a great time hitting the various bars, establishments with dancing poles, and beach bars throughout the evening. Everything finished up at a karaoke bar where we danced and sang for the rest of the evening. Morning came too soon so after breakfast, we headed home (after hitting a couple of geocaches) to finishing cleaning the house and relaxing for the rest of the evening.

I hope Santa brings me that mistletoe belt I asked for!

This evening I went to Ybor with some friends for the annual Santa Pub Crawl. We met at my friend Michelle's place and walked down to the strip. Outside of hashing, I really hadn't attended many events like this, so it was great to meet a lot of different people. I dressed up as the Christmas Pleasure Fairy and was one of the finalists in the costume contest, however was beat out by a hot recreation of Cindy Lou Who.

The Joy of Sax - Life is like Jazz, it should be improvised.

I was set to hare the trail for TBH3 and had it arranged so that we'd meet early and close enough to be able to make it to the Pub Crawl that was sponsored by WAKA, the kickball league with which we have a team that plays Tuesday evenings. I had intended to scout a bit earlier, but I had so much to do this morning, and of course yesterday was obviously unproductive, that I didn't have a chance to do anything. I hared from that general location previously, so I knew my way around. The entire trail was live and I was the only hare. After giving 'caulk talk' to a couple of virgins that showed up, I took off. trail was fun and I was able to keep it fairly interesting by running the pack through a couple of bars, a house under construction (taking them through the back door and out the front window), and down the street through an art show in Old Hyde Park that I had not know was there. I looped them back to the start for a beer stop and then on toward Howard, through McDinton's pub (where we would start our pub crawl) and then through a few apartment complexes on the way to the end. Though there were only a couple of runners, the pack enjoyed the trail and we finished in enough time to get to the pub.

The pub crawl was fun for the portion I attended. I had to leave early since I want to the Harry Connick Jr concert at the invitation of my friend Heather, whom was able to join the start of the pub crawl. after a scenic tour to Ruth Eckerd Hall, we arrived just in time. The show was enjoyable, however I was surprised as to how much talking he was doing instead of music playing. He related a lot of stories that were humorous and interesting, so at least it was entertaining. I really enjoyed listening to the music and recognized a few songs, including a rendention of 'Hello Dolly'. Afterwards we went back to see if anyone was still around, but most had gone home. I was able to hang out with Michelle and her out-of-town friends until the bars closed down for the evening and had an overall great time.

Red Ship Hits Blue Ship - Sailors Marooned

Saturday was Tampa H3's annual Red Dress Run. We had about 80 people show up to enjoy the nice weather and had folks from Daytona, Naples, and BVD show up. As soon as people were showing up they were directed down the road to the first bar where pictures were being taken to be made into key chains for the attendees. It was nice to see some of the old school hashers (ones that rarely show up to normal runs) attend and get to see some of my traveling friends from other hash kennels. After our first stop at some neighborhood bar we headed to Dogwater Cafe for a while (the location where we ended a few years ago and general hash bar whenever we do any runs nearby). After what was a short jaunt down to 'Wild Gentleman's Club' (yes a strip bar) where there was a full keg waiting. Along the way, apparently some of us thought it would be funny to play in the lined up traffic waiting for the light to change. I'm sure we were quite entertaining for the denizens that were just expecting to go about their business. Oh well, it was fun and no one got smashed by a car, so I suppose it turned out well. The entertainment provided by the hashers was more fun that the paid ..er... staff. The last time we were here (a couple of years ago) there were rules that said we were not allowed on stage, which was of course ignored after 10 minutes. This time they specifically allowed us up there and let everyone dance and have a good time. It was quite a bit of fun and large enough to move around, but small enough to keep everyone together.

After leaving this spot we loaded up into the special transportation which of course ended up being a large U-Haul truck, though it was empty inside (e.g. no couches or mattresses). A short ride to the next bar (Blondie's) was made shorter by group songs. Soon after arriving our dinner of pizza showed up, after which it became eerily quiet. apparently the only way to shut these people up is to stuff their mouths with something! anyway, we were soon off again, this time to gay bar called Valentine's that happened to by next door to my old dance school. I went by to see my teacher, but there was a class in progress that I did not want to interrupt. We were at the bar for a while and had our ceremonies and awards (for 'Sexiest outfit', 'Most Complete Package', and so forth). Our last drive was to the bar where we first started so we could pick up the key chains. We headed home around 11PM or so since I had to drop off Service and Candy at their place. Except for the key chains being SNAFU, it was a great time. This was unfortunately BMW's last hash event as she was getting reading to head out Thursday for Army boot camp. She'll be out of touch for a while, but as soon as we get her APO address we're planning on sending care packages that will surely embarrass her and be a grand source for entertaining stories for when she gets back.

Pics from the event can be found here:
http://www.kodakgallery.com/I.jsp?c=vnlbugz.bu99p51r&x=0&y=pvd2e0

When regard for truth has been broken down or even slightly weakened, all things will remain doubtful. - St Augustine

This weekend was spent on a little road trip. Two of the Tampa runners were getting married (to each other even!) in St. Augustine on a weekend which happened to coincide with the annual pub crawl held in the city. I have been there a couple of times before and have always enjoyed the area, especially the beaches and old fort. I've also been dying to really try out the teardrop camper I picked up a few months ago and decided to take it with me, especially since the hostel was all booked up by other runners and folks that were with the wedding party. I got a late start on Friday since I had to run a bunch of errands to do.

After arriving, I found a place to park, put together my bike, and found the place folks were meeting. Most of the people there were wedding party members milling about and dancing. We hit a couple of different spots such as Tradewinds Tavern, the local VFW, and St. George Tavern. After shutting down the last bar those still standing grabbed a couple of slices of pizza before heading to the hostel. Apparently some folks were asleep, however we soon took care of that little issue. I didn't want to hang for too long and soon left to to ride over to where I was parked, throw the bike into the truck, and crawl in for a nice rest.

When I got up in the morning, I decided to bike around the city for a while to take in some of the nicer areas. I first hit the old Spanish fort, Castillo de San Marcos, since the National Park Pass that I got for the California trip allowed me free access. As I was going in, I happened to run into a couple of Tampa hashers and watched the cannon firing demonstration with them for a while before starting to head off again. The reenactment is done several times a day by local volunteers that give up their time to help teach visitors about the fort's history. I then did a quick ride to the Mission of Nombre de Dios that is readily noticeably by the 200+ foot steel cross looking over the city. This is a site of some beautifully maintained grounds and holds the Shrine of Our Lady of La Leche. After reflecting here for a while I checked out some of the numerous art galleries and gift shops that make up much of the downtown area.

Around one o'clock I loaded up and drove across the bridge to Anastacia Island to where the pub crawl would start. Using the camper kitchenette I made a couple of sandwiches while taking the time to relax a bit and enjoy the weather (which was considerable warmer than the previous evening). Much of the rest of the day was a lot of fun as I met and chatted with new folks and even ran into some friends that I wasn't expecting to see! We hit numerous pubs including The British Pub, Nubby's Sports Bar, Santa Maria Restaurant, Tradewinds Tavern, VFW, Milltop Tavern (good live music), St. George Tavern, and another bar or two of which I cannot remember the names. At the last bar the wedding party (or those still moving) caught up with us and livened things up a little bit, however it was already pretty late and people were dropping out.

I caught a ride back to where my car was and followed some folks to the Anastasia Island State Park since they already had a spot reserved. After getting cleaned up, I quickly crawled into the camper (being very thankful for not having to set up anything) and quickly crashed. In the morning I made some portabella mushroom sandwiches and elected to stay at the park while the others took off for breakfast and home. The park offered several hiking trails, including an ancients dunes interpretive trail that provide info on the local flora as it looped around for a couple of miles. I then headed to the beach and rode the bike one a 7-8 mile round trip to go around to the inlet so I could get some shots of the approach to the fort and enjoy a nice bit of peddling. After making a quick lunch, and getting stopped a couple of times by people wanting to check out the camper, I took a last stroll in the park along the old Spanish quarry and made a quick stop at the St. Augustine Light Station for some photos, though I didn't have time to climb to the top.

Overall it was a great weekend and a nice way to not only hang out with some old and new friends, but also take in the sites and enjoy some of the Florida resources.

Tampa Red Dress Run

Saturday was the Tampa Red Dress Run with Kiddie and Semper Bi as the hares. We had a really early start, for a pub crawl, of around noon so that people could go to the Gasparilla night parade if they wanted. Since I had seen everything from red body latex paint, red Saran Wrap, and even red duct tape dresses, I figured that I'd try for something a bit different; so I decided to go for a full body Afghan burqa. I did some internet searching and could only really find them in blue or black. Apparently red isn't a popular color for some reason and had to have one specially made and then shipped over from Pakistan. The full body burqa only had a mesh covering for the eyes and I needed some kind of access for drinking, eating, flirting, etc since even using a straw would be a hassle. ICP and I went to More Sex's place to pick up my outfit since she was quite kind enough to do some alterations for me by cutting around the mesh and adding some Velcro backing so I could open and close the flap (kind of like the knight in 'Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail'). We met at the Hyde Park complimentary parking garage's top level (also known as the 'there is too much f'n wind deck' in nautical terms) and waited for the hashers to arrive. We had a bunch of out of towners come in with several from Gainesville (Hops on Pops and 4-5 of her friends), BangsHerMash from England, and LateNightDriveThru from Washington DC (in town for her sister's wedding).

For transportation, Kiddie had given us change and a bus/trolley map that would take us downtown. We got a lot of honks from passing cars, including a red (of course) fire truck. We loaded onto the bus and headed downtown and had a good time singing through a few hash songs. We were doing a rendention of 'Today is Monday' and got to Friday, at which time the driver gets on the bus intercom and says "I like Friday too" to much laughter and applause from the hashers. A bit later, just before we get to the final destination, he gets on the intercom again and says "You should be aware that Florida state law requires that all hookers must stand in front of the yellow line". I immediately jump up and run to the front of the bus, well as much quickly as one may do in a burqa with a field of vision like that of looking through a toilet paper tube. He just glances over, grabs the intercom again, and simple says "ummm, nevermind". Too funny.

The first bar was across the street from the Ice Palace, Newk's. As we're going in I spot a line of police motorcycles parked in front and run up to get ICP to snap a pic (the one you see with blog this entry). It was a bit windy, so the burqa was a bit form hugging and gives an overall "I'm batman" kind of look, but I hope it'll make the hash pin-up calendar soon. After jumping on another bus (and having a shot stop" along the way) we walked to another bar later that turned out to be a local gay bar that opened up early just for us, since we were the only patrons. There was a tune box there so we loaded up on some songs, which I obviously had to include 'Y.M.C.A' from 'The Village People' and even a selection from 'Big Bad Voodoo Daddy' so I could do a little swing. We hit "The Hub" on our next pub stop and met a lot of great people since it is a pretty well known bar anyway. Kitty Litter and a few of the guys chatted with a couple of ladies and used one of them for a singing of 'Aloutte', much to the joy of the other bar patrons. By this point, all bathrooms became unisex as there was no distinction as to who belonged in one room or another, merely what seemed to have the shortest line. We even picked up a couple of other guys that joined us for the rest of the event and showered them with red accessories or extra dresses so they would fit right in.

We headed further downtown and went to the park that was being used as a staging area for the night parade and stopped at the Red Barron pizza tent for some free samples that definitely hit the spot! We went over to Gilligan's pub and relaxed there a while as the floats were set up. Instead of heading straight to the next bar, we simply walked through the barriers and went straight down the streets that had the parade floats set up with all the krewes hanging around waiting for the start. We stopped at seemingly every float and chatted with the pirates and their wenches who were as interested in us as we were them. I had never seen the hash pack so spread out and it was a miracle that those of us in the back could even find the bar since there were no trail markings being used. We went to Amberchucks, just a block from our first bar, and then took the bus back towards Hyde Park with a stop at The Moustrap by the University of Tampa campus. This was a dive bar that I am sure was well over the capacity limit with just the hashers. We had a few late comers (though better to come late than not at all I suppose) such as OpenWide and PorkTheClown. When we left a SNAFU had us walk past the bus stop and by the time we figured it out and turned around, we missed the pickup. Apparently after 9PM the busses were on a 30 minute schedule and of course we left the last bar at exactly 9:05PM, so it truly sucked sitting in the cold waiting for the next pick-up. We entertained ourselves as best we could, which pretty much meant we just huddled together to try to stay warm since the amount of clothing used to cover our skin might have been able to be made into a single bed sheet, though every now and then one of use would break off and play with the hula-hoop that someone snagged somewhere along the trail.

A couple of us came back to my place to hang out in the hot tub, though there were a lot fewer that showed up than said they would. Apparently they were not all athletes like some of us and petered out before they made it to my house. The 101 degree water was a nice contrast to the cold air and a good way to end the day and soak the sore muscles and blisters. Though we didn't have a lot of people (with only about 50 people or so attending which I suppose was by design to make it easier on the hares with logistics), it was a good time.

ICP has a bunch of photos posted on www.hashflash.com. Click on 'Tampa Flash' and then 'Red Dress 06'.

Naples Pub Crawl

I traveled to Naples Saturday afternoon for their '3-Some Pub Crawl', their 3rd anniversary event. We met at a hotel around 6PM in Naples since we figured that after hitting 6-7 pubs, few would be in driving shape. HayRideMe from West Palm Beach brought over MistHerBush and another 4 friends (Tracey, Melissa, Joe, etc) and arrived around the same time as I did. We hung out in their room for a while and chatted as the others hashers were joining. Though a few others were supposed to come down with me (CaughtFromBehind, Service, Candy, KittyLitter, Wronghole) all off them dropped out over the past week, so I was the only Tampa attendee. Orlando hashers ThanksForTheMammaries, Catmando, and OralHershey as well as Washington D.C hasher F'em Dano showed up for the event as well.

HighBallz led the circle with the introductions and such and then with a requested 3 minute head start (which as expected, probably turned into 10 minutes at least) we had a few accusations and announcements to make. TurfTits has been complaining about my not bringing some panties, bra, and other stuff that she had left in my room the last time the Naples folks visited Tampa (I slept on the couch that weekend, thank you). Hashers have a tradition of using lost property as accusation material, generally for just being forgetful and somewhat annoying in making others keep track of their stuff. I called her into the circle and explained to the pack that I was accusing her of lost property and could see how she got excited as I pulled out a plastic shopping bag, expecting to finally get her stuff.

"I accuse Turf of leaving her stuff in my place, and after considerable searching, I think I have located her items."

I then pulled out the largest pair of panties that you have ever seen. Her look changed quite dramatically from excitement to horror as I stretched out those things. I think that they were about as wide as she was tall (Turf is a tiny young lass). The pack seemed to think it was quite funny. Right before I drove down Saturday, I had stopped by the thrift store and rummaged through the women's section. The moment I found them I knew it was perfect! I have no idea what happened to her original stuff and I probably just tossed them when I was on a cleaning spree several months ago. I paid for her weekend pub crawl and we agreed to call it even.

After circle, we did a trail of a total of about 50 meters; straight to the back of a 20' moving truck that was complete with several couches, coolers, and seats. Everyone loaded in and we headed to the first of several pubs. The bars were about as expected, though a bit empty as it was still quite early in the evening (after all, we were starting around 7 o'clock). We had a nice spread of food at the half way mark of wings, pizza, fries, and poppers along will all the expected beer. Music was a bit varied, but at one bar it was a bit off as the DJ (with the term used quite loosely) jumping to different tempos and genres. The pack was dancing for a while with some nice rock or alternative and then without warning it would just be switch to something like Bryan Adams or other such sleeper song. Mammaries, along with other members of the pack, was calling for the guy to try to get something better in play. At some point the DJ (that was quite short, kind of like Service in Tampa) walked over to Mammaries's companion, who had nothing to do with any of this and was just sitting with her minding his own business, and started fussing about the music requests/complaints. Mams, a very easy going veterinarian, got a bit annoyed and stood up to say something and was cut off by the guys hasty retreat back to his booth. We hit a few more spots before finally closing down the bowling alley bar (our last stop) around 2AM. As we left to get back into the van, Fux grabbed one of the bowling balls and took it out of the building and threw it in the truck. I can tolerate some things people do, but blatant stealing like that is just not cool. I grabbed the ball and took it back inside, Fux was pretty oblivious to most things anyway, but later found he also may have taken a pitcher and glass at some point in the evening.

We got back to the hotel around 3AM and hung around for a while. At some point Turf and Hershey had gone to the room to sleep. Fux, for some unknown reason, just started pounding on their door. I immediately told him to stop and he honestly could not comprehend the fact that the noise wouldn't be limited to just that room. I again reiterated that it was a very bad idea, but stupid is as stupid does, so he kept doing it for a while. At some point the manager, looking like an evil Santa Claus, came out and, without warning, told everyone they had to leave. Not a single thing had been said before this point by anyone outside the group, though several of us tried to get the others to quiet down at some point. A local sheriff's officer came by and had to force the vacancy since his hands were tied. The problem was not only did they kick out the group of us that had retired to the room that the West Palm Beach people had, but the cop went to the room that had Turf and Hershey sleeping, opened it up, and told them to leave. They hadn't don't anything to warrant this, and protested as such, but the manager said they were merely 'guilty by association' and demanded their removal. The cop was very professional throughout this, even with Fux's (and some other guy I don't know) were being a bit belligerent. Turf and Queen let me crash with them, so I left to follow them back as soon as I had helped some people load their stuff. I heard from Porcelina that after we left, the police had to come back since Fux and a few others still hadn't left and threw them in cuffs for continuing to trespass, but eventually let them go [probably a bad idea]. Sad how just a couple of idiots can screw over so many others. Being drunk is fine, but when you're a stupid drunk and being an asshole, then you need find some other group.

In the morning HB and I unloaded the van, retanked it, and took it by the rental facility and then joined Porcelina, Dano, AssFault and his girl for breakfast. With the truck rental, food, and beer the hash ended up a little bit in the whole, but they had a lot of fun. It was very well planned and executes. Unfortunately I don't think any of them will be able to make the TBH3 Red Dress Run next week (which unfortunately has Orlando and West Palm having their event at the same time). It takes a lot of work to organize these kinds of events in getting a block of hotel rooms reserved, contacting and negotiating with 6-7 bars, picking up the materials, etc. Porcelina and HighBallz have, as always, done a great job to get the hash organized and make sure that everyone has a good time. Without them, the overall event would not have been nearly as interesting or fun. I hope that the pack down there appreciate the amount of work that they both put into the events.

I was the hash camera whore for most of the evening after getting ahold of Porcelina's camera and will add photos of the event as soon she sends them to me. Overall, I had a wonderful time and really enjoyed hanging out with friends and meeting several new people.