It may be that my purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

Rumple and I decided to cook breakfast so after he did some shopping last night, we got up early to start grilling up some food on the patio grill and ended up with omelets and hash browns. the hotel staff wasn't to happy about me taking their mattress every night, so they got an extra bed for Mam's room and just charge me an extra $30, which is fair enough for some decent sleep over the next few nights. Today's trip was to Mt. Warning for a 5.5 mile roundtrip hike to the top through the rain forest. this place is sacred among the aboriginals for several reasons among them a historic meeting spot as well as that this is the first point in Australia to get the light of the rising sun. On the ride up I talked to Walkabout for a while concerning how he helps the Appalachian Mountain Club near his house outside of NYC.

The hike itself was really nice and just a hint of rain heading up since the canopy prevent much from reaching the ground though we could still hear it. Part way up we had some great views of Byron Bay, however once we got higher it became more of a Wollumbin (cloud catcher) mountain. The final few hundred feet was quite steep such that a few of the hashers decided to not to all the way to the top. There wasn't any views due to the clouds, but it was nice to make it up nonetheless. It did pour quite a bit on the way down and got pretty slick with just about everyone taking a few slips before reaching the bottom. We stopped in Uki on the way back for a beer and watched as the mountain cleared up once again. Once returning to the hotel we went through an 'American style' hash so we could burn through all the liquor and beer. We heading into town for an excellent Thai dinner before turning in for the evening.

If dolphins are so smart, why can't they just avoid the nets?

Last night was kind of rough since I found out my roommate Candyfloss snores like a Scottish banshee to the point where I grabbed the sleeping pad from my hiking pack and crawled into the bathroom with the door closed so I could get some sleep. Most of the bus group decided to go kayaking on a dolphin seeing excursion. Though I wanted to hang with the group, I have a lot of opportunity to paddle in Florida and see dolphins much of the time anyway and I just didn't think it was worth another $40 for me. Mams and I stayed with the group while they learned about the paddling and launch from the beach into the surf, though I must admit watching various folks try to get past the surf zone for the first time was entertaining the from what I understand there were no dolphins to be seen on the trip. While mams did her shopping and rest, I went swimming at the beach behind our hotel for a while until everyone got back.

We were bussed to a hash start location hosted by the Ballina hash after we stopped by a lookout over Lennox Natural Surfing Reserve for a group shot. The run was a nice spot along the inlet pier, beach, and other nice spots wit the end having a lunchtime cookout set up for the whole group. At circle Mr. X attempted to use a red card, however it was for Cosmo. The trail was nice enough to earn points, however there were deductions involved; -2 for not being hot enough, -1 for no dolphins, and -1 for not enough sunbathers on the beach). Mealticket competed in a down-down competition with Chaulky, but it might have been a tie. By the time they finished, the rest of us had probably forgotten what was going on. There were gonad down-downs, a Chinese circle fire drill, and realization that a soggy coconut might not contain only coconut milk. Fluffer got accused of queue jumping but was able to get out of it with a wonderful rendition of a dolphin chirp (which is surprising since we have yet to see any to imitate). This was my first exposure to a group of hashers (Bellina H3) that do not sing. I would later learn that apparently few hashes in all of Australia or New Zealand really sing. They typically use the same song for every single down-down.

We headed to the Ballina bowling club where we were entertaining by the chicken doing the wedding chicken dance on the table while talking to some of the locals. On the way home we saw a 20-foot prawn statute which the hash figured it would take two of to feed Weinerschnitzel. When we got back to the hotel I grabbed the cushion from the sofa in the front lobby to use as a mattress since Hummingbird and Mammaries allowed me to stay in their room so I could get some sleep.

I've always thought of tourists as a food source for the wildlife.

At breakfast I saw a small container of vegemite and figured that I had to give it a try due to the popularity of the lyrics in the Mean at Work song, 'Land Down Under'. I hereby suggest they be changed to "she just smiled and handed me a bitter, ass-tasting, nasty, yeast spread sandwich". Wow, I was even warned by others to be wary, but that stuff was pretty interesting and not something I'd like to repeat. I'm definitely willing to give most things a try, but it doesn't necessarily mean I'll repeat the effort.

We loaded up the bus early and headed to the Currumbin Wildlife Sanctuary for the morning to check out the kind of Australian wildlife that cannot be found in pubs. This place is pretty well known for the daily feeding of the rainbow lorikeets. Visitors can hold large aluminum pans that contain the sweet mixture that the birds seem to like and thus tend to swarm anyone that has one in their grasp. It was a lot more fun than expected. a lot of the bout tour participants decided to get pictures taken with the koalas and after a bit of peer pressure, I figured I might as well join in as well. those little things are fairly heavy, but have a pretty stiff smell due to their oily glands. After the photo session, everyone tend to wander around a while to check out the other animals that ranged from kangaroos to snakes and Tasmania Devils. Lunch was set aside for us in a private area with some finger sandwiches. We did not see any babies in the dingo enclosure, but we did learn that kolas do not seem to speak Spanish. Oily Hole was apparently trying to entice them from their slumber with calls of "Hola koala!", however they did not seem to make them stir.

After the sanctuary, we were suppose to me at some aboriginal cultural center to be lead around Minjunbal Cultural Center and the surrounding historical site to learn about some of the area history. Well, apparently the first guide that was supposed to do the tour had recently died. A second guide had been found and a few days before we arrived, had left the area to go on walkabout. The third guide, and person that showed us around, was there on her first day and proceeds to pretty much read off the plant names from the signs, though was very nice and did attempt to show us around for a bit while spare Rib proceeded to pull down much of the forest in terms of branches, sticks, and fronds. On the way back to the hotel we stopped for drinks on a nice patio and even stretched out on a wooden boat until we were told it was supposed to be a planter and not a seating area. Oh well.

When we got to the small hotel near Byron Bay I was thrilled to see a package with the lens waiting for me in the room and immediately felt a lot better! Mams came down with a handful of envelops that contained cards. Apparently Kristen had arranged with Mams to give me one of the cards each day but with everyone going on and the constant early morning packing and moving, it slipped her mind, so I tended to get several at once. The cards were pretty much just nice little notes along with pictures of some of our adventures over the past few months. At dinner we had a waitress named Ellyphant (I kid you not). Dr. PP had already arranged the large meal with salad, steak, 2 drinks, etc already ordered and being prepared when we arrived! At circle, Oily was called out for her Spanish wake-up attempt, Tinkerbell got the hashit, and Neptunus lost his red card. When we were singing "Why were you born so beautiful .." Neptunus got up to moon and Dr. PP had this look of horror and yelled out 'Nooooooo' so loudly that everything stopped. Spare rib conducted 'dip tests' while Mr. X was called out for giving wildlife advice. Apparently at the sanctuary on of the Kangaroos was cleaning certain parts of itself and someone commented that they wish they could do that to which Mr. X responded "well if you give him some roo food he'll probably let you".

News cameramen go on strike - slides at 11.

After breakfast I took a few minutes to call Kristen (I brought a flash drive with Skype as well as a headset w/microphone) to catch up with the trip so far and to sheepishly ask to borrow her camera lens. My lens stopped zooming in Sydney and I know of nearly any trip, I most needed an operable camera. She also uses a Canon and had the very same lens as I did, so she wrapped it up and sent it express to Australia to a hotel which I knew we'd be staying in a few days. It definitely is not cheap, but if I had to purchase a new lens from a store I would have had to spend a whole lot more.

We hoped on board the bus that would be transporting us for the next week and headed off to an area called Surfer's Paradise. It was a bit too rough to try to surf, but I did rent a body board to play in the waves for a little while. The hashers would generally meander around to the different areas from the beach to the shopping and bar areas around the hotel. In the afternoon we met up to take the bus one mile to the start of the evening hash hosted by two of the local Brisbane hashes. One thing the group learned quickly is that when Dr. PP says the bus leaves at a particular time, she means it! Python and Fluffer had to look up the hash start location on the Gold Coast Hash website and then catch a taxi to the run start (a park with another large collection of bats) when they missed the cut off time! We had a good trail with several walker/runner splits that took us along some of the interesting spots in the area and stuff I was already thinking of checking out. We went through several pedestrian bridges, parks and along the beach. There was even a shot stop a a surf kayaking club house along the beach. we hang out, I get to know more and more of the group including Dr. PP, Higgins, Rumple Foreskin, Mr. X, Python, Fluffer, Rose Eh, Tinkerbell, Hummingbird, Oily Hole, and Sex Toy. I definitely do not think I'd forget Higgins after he broke out the garlic vodka. that has to be about the most vile stuff I can even comprehend and cannot imagine getting drunk on that, especially even having a big hangover in the morning and feeling it slosh around at any point. After the run there was a nice spread of sandwiches and other foodstuffs.

At the circle, locals Ass Up and Jerry (?) [my notes are a bit scribbled and hard to read several months later as I compose this blog are accused of suspiciously coming out the bush while someone named Cosmo is always being accused of something. Never mind they they are not even on this trip and someone else (usually Mr. X) has to be a stand-in, but I'm sure this hasher must be deserving. Rubber Choak was called out for locking herself of of her room in little save for her undies while Oily Hole almost got flattened by a car and got a down-down to help remember to look the other way (plus for being a big target for bat guano). Ice Box of Brisbane organized a lot of the hash bus tour activities. Brisbane must have a thing for them since it seemed like a rubber chicken convention. Also, Sex Toy got outed for introducing herself by her hash name to a stranger a t a bar at LAX. Random notes of which I cannot remember the meaning: Mr X slept on room key, Mammaries finds a long single hair somewhere.

The best way to pay for a lovely moment is to enjoy it.

Mams wanted to go see birds and was told that Centennial Park was the best place, so we headed off to see what was available. though there were not quite as many birds as was hoped, it was a very beautiful area and we did see quite a few black swans around. We didn't have long to hang around as we had to get to the airport for our flight. For whatever reason, apparently our flight times were different and I was to arrive a couple of hours early in Brisbane. The flight crew on my plane reminded me a bit of southwest in that they try to have some fun. the announcer started by "Today we have on board the lovely Jane, the lovely Sue, and the lovely Sarah. My name is Michelle and I am also lovely." The flight wasn't bad at all and once I got to Brisbane, I was easily able to figure out the train system to get into town. after a bit of waiting the hostel transport picked me up. Most of the hashers weren't in yet, so I took the opportunity to get a bit of rest as I was still trying to rest my internal clock and recuperate from all the running around. The rest of the evening was spent meeting the other members of the bus tour until I couldn't stay up any longer and thus went back to bed for the rest of the evening. Being so tired, I really wasn't able to remember most of the names but figured I'd get to know everyone soon enough.